crossroads

I am at a crossroads.
Standing here, intermediary
I anxiuosly attempt to look down the nefarious road,
squinting my cobalt eyes forcefully,
attempting to see if I can sneak a little peek
towards the future, deplorably longing to know what lies ahead.
But there is no way to tell
the sly obdurate road is smothered in a blank, taunting fog
delicate enough to allow the onlooker to recognize the continuation and tenacity of the road
but purposefully coagulated and impenetrable to the human eye
revealing only
obscurity.

I am at a crossroads.
I look from side to side and the present besieges me
bored with this existence, the familiarity my comfort and my cage
I know I must move.

I am at a crossroads.
Behind me lies my past, the bitter ghost of who I was, inconsolably tagging along
No matter how far I walk down this aphotic road,
it is always there, a part of who I shall be.
It took me ten years of walking to learn that neither circumvention nor delusion
would shake it from me, I am not a snake molting dead skin.
Oh those were the years, running on down the road thinking I hadn't a single problem that could catch up to me...
What ignorantly blissful years those were.

I am at a crossroads.
Shall I run? That's my first instinct.
My mind says, do not think about fear of the unknown, just go for it!
Get it over with.
But no, I won't run.
I've learned that harsh lesson one too many times.

I am at a crossroads.
The only thing left to do...
walk eagerly ahead into the untold,
trust in the lessons I have learned on my journey
knowing that there's no way to tell what shall ensue,
just that I am going somewhere.