hospital confessional.

I am sitting
helpless beside her
hospital bed body
in chair mind
not present

nurses interrupt
taking vitals, pain--
relief

she sleeps, IV--
protruding from her arm
like a giant tick
swollen to capacity
embedded in a dog

my mind--
wanders

life has become a ceaseless dream of lucidity
where i sit--
watching
the nurses--
prodding
the ones i love--
in johnnys

burning so brightly as to singe the thoughts
in the forefront of my mind, becoming a part of all the thoughts
that pass

is the realization that
their future is uncertain
their lives may end
there is nothing I can do about it

but
sit.
watch.
think.