the worrier

i worry worry worry
about my worry's worry's worry
i think about things that can and will and do go wrong
before they do and while they are and after the fact
i worry about thinking and worrying too much
i hope that all this thinking and worrying won't affect my health
i worry that the article i just read about that isn't true
i worry about where my next meal will come from
whether the rent check will bounce
if there will ever be a time where i am
doing more than just sliding on by
and actually making it
i worry that i will never make it
i worry that thoughts of never making it can, in fact, truly make it possible for you not to make it, just because you worried and had the thought that you couldn't

a fix?

i wanted the instant gratification that is you
because like all humans
i crave
am in search of
the quick fix
instantaneous relief
of something
that fills the void
of nothingness
but inside i know what this is
there is no chance for us
to be interminable
in my mind's eye
i can already see
the point where you and i
will part ways.

different hopes

we've slipped back down the slopes of time
right back to the place
we started

i loathe the power he wields over you
your father
can make your life blissful or miserable
all in one action
one word
one sentence

i want you to be happy
he wants you to live for his convenience

i encourage you to dream, and to live them

he's afraid of you doing anything other than what he knows

now is the time
be an adult
break free
claim your life
and live it

psysics.

hard body breakers
sustaining forces
experts on impact
to the body

what is the impact of a body?
today, not so much
if the body is mine.

break all the blocks.
and let the numbers do the rest
just don't become a victim
of the laws of physics

they say its your birthday.

a year has passed
and what has been gained?

time went by, and still
more pain

try and try
to keep a handle on the madness
and life throws something else into the mix

more.
sadness.

bursting bubbles

life, the love story
i once thought i loved
even just the thought
of being in love

prince charming
and happily
ever after
that bubble burst
when you walked out the door

like daddy did
as friends do
countless others
who play me for a fool

you opened my eyes that day
i grew up they say
but i miss those times
when the fairy tales
were mine.